Devious Journal Entry

I am truly sorry for what I have said or done to my friends. Friends who only tried to help me and get along with me. 
This is it, I treat people like I treat myself sometimes, I understood that. Most of my criticism are for myself, because I need to remind me of that. 
My classes are coming and I'm freaking out, paranoiac, sad. I feel like everybody don't like me, sincerely, I feel alone there. But I know this is consequence of my own actions.
Depression and self hate. They come together with my classes, and I'm starting to feel like last year, it's like i can't get through those obstacles.
bla bla bla 
About my Drawings, I feel like I've lost something that made them special, I don't have it anymore. It's not that joy I had on drawing. Empty. Maybe I am improving my techniques, but that's just it. No magic.
When I get better, I'll have good art to post here. Thanks for your patience.